


what happens when you give a wix technology...

by huff_le_puff



Series: No Second Chances Allowed [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:40:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27128021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/huff_le_puff/pseuds/huff_le_puff
Summary: a collection of one shots where the characters of NSCA are given technology.(not canon!!)
Series: No Second Chances Allowed [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1659640
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	1. Azrael Lezwig (alternatively: Lydia Is Persuasive)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dagger = lydia  
> burning bush = hermione
> 
> Momma Weasley - mrs. weasley/molly  
> Smart Daughter = hermione

_** Text Message: ** _

_** dagger > burning bush  ** _

**flaming bush:** Let Molly know I’ll be late for Sunday dinner please? I’m stuck in this meeting for Dept. of RCMC and Lezwig is trying to suggest a law that require werewolves to wear collars.

**dagger:** what the fuck? first name and address please, i’m on my way to put a shock collar on him

**dagger:** actually, i retract that please

**flaming bush:** Lydia, no! 

**dagger:** lydia yes :D

**dagger:** anyway yeah, i’ll let her know we’ll be late. crowbar necessary or just collar?

~~~

**dagger:** heyyyyy hermione

**burning bush:** Oh God, what did you do Lydia McBrien?

**dagger:** okay so don’t bother getting your heart rate up with anger k?

**dagger:** i threatened lezwig (address 702 Lupus Lane, Devon ENG) with my favorite knife because i love you very much and he won’t be bothering you again

**burning bush:** Lydia, what?!

**burning bush:** Why?!

**dagger:** well we can’t have him for Minister can we? it’s a shame Kings isn’t running again because he’s pretty cool

**dagger:** not that i don’t love you, of course. but i feel like it’s bad to vote for someone you know well in an election

**burning bush:** Lydia, I can’t express to you how worried I am for you. 

**dagger:** you’ve sure tried though

**burning bush:** Lydia, have I got to tattle to Momma? Because I WILL. 

**dagger:** she’s cool with it ;)

**burning bush:** There is absolutely no way she’s “cool” with this! 

~~~

_** Text Message:  ** _

_** Smart Daughter > Momma Weasley ** _

**Smart Daughter:** Momma, did you say you were fine with Lydia threatening and possibly killing Azrael Lezwig?

**Momma Weasley:** Yes, I did, Dear. 

**Momma Weasley:** Is that a problem?

**Smart Daughter:** Really, Momma? 

**Momma Weasley:** You know your sister has her ways and quite honestly Azrael Lezwig has been getting on my nerves!

**Smart Daughter:** Oh Hela. 

**Momma Weasley:** Oh by the way, you haven’t heard from Harry have you? He missed Sunday dinner. 

**Smart Daughter:** No, I haven’t. But I’ll send him my condolences for when you find him. 

~~~

_** Text Message: ** _

_** dagger > burning bush ** _

**burning bush:** Ugh. How did you kill him?

**dagger:** awww you’re accepting it!!

**burning bush:** Lydia. How. Did. You. Do. It. 

**dagger:** haha i pushed him against the wall and when he leaned in to kiss me (idiot thought i’d kiss him?) i put my elbow into his throat and my knife into his rib cage 

**dagger:** he was very open minded after that. though he seemed breathless about resigning from the election, i think it was relief

**dagger:** he seemed very stressed 

**burning bush:** You

**dagger:** me!

**burning bush:** You forced Lezwig to resign???

**dagger:** forced, persuaded, strongly suggested...it’s all the same

**dagger:** but yes ma’am!! i sure did!

**burning bush:** ...

**dagger:** i’m sure the election won’t be quite a challenge now, but he was annoying me. i only meant to change his mind about the collar thing, honestly

**burning bush:** Oh my Morgana. Is he going to tell?

**dagger:** nah, he’s asleep and his wife (Maria, real sweet. she gave me cocoa) thinks i found him in a pub fight

**burning bush:** I can’t believe you. I really can’t. 

**dagger:** learn to. 

**dagger:** Momma was very upset when you couldn’t make it last Sunday because of Lezwig. i don’t like when Momma’s sad


	3. gay

**the (better) trio**

**gin tonic:** wait so i just found something out

**la la lu lu:** Ooh!! What is it, love?

**diaBOLICAL:** lol. is it like that time you learned horses & unicorns aren’t the same? 

**gin tonic:** 1\. shut your bitch mouth, lydia

**gin tonic:** 2\. supposedly 1 in 4 people are gay

**diaBOLICAL:** ouch. my feelings. you called me a bitch. i shall never recover.

**la la lu lu:** But if I’M gay, and Ginny’s gay...

**diaBOLICAL:** i’m half gay!!!

**gin tonic:** OH MERLIN

**gin tonic:** IS THE NEVILLE THE 1

**diaBOLICAL:** oh my god he is!!!

**la la lu lu:** Neville is our token straight friend! Ha Ha!!

**gin tonic:** asdfghjkl 

**diaBOLICAL:** asfjdhjgd

**la la lu lu:**...You are both so very gay. 

**gin tonic:** girls are better than quidditch

**diaBOLICAL:** woah. okay. let’s calm down y’all. 

**gin tonic:** no

**gin tonic:** we are never calm

**gin tonic:** who told you that awful lie

**la la lu lu:** HA. HA. WE LIKE TO YELL. 

**diaBOLICAL:** lmao. we do. 

**diaBOLICAL:** oh btw i met a pretty girl

**gin tonic:** OH HELL YEAH TELL US EVERYTHING

**la la lu lu:** Send a photo! We must judge her!! 🥺🥰😡

**_diaBOLICAL has sent a photo_ **

**la la lu lu:** Who took it?

**diaBOLICAL:** gin’s mum

**gin tonic:** 1\. she is your mum too, dummy. 

**gin tonic:** 2\. SHE KNOWS???

**diaBOLICAL:** of course momma knows. what do you take me for, a bad daughter?? momma caught us sleeping at my flat when she came to drop off food & took the photo. 

**gin tonic:** the fact that mum has a key to your flat and i don’t :’(

**la la lu lu:** Congratulations Lydia!!! I approve!! 🥰✨💕👏🏳️🌈

**diaBOLICAL:** thank you lu :)

**gin tonic:** wow i love being ignored 

**gin tonic:** wait but we can’t even see her face!

**diaBOLICAL:** patience. 

**gin tonic:** no

**gin tonic:** lydia i know you’re reading this

**gin tonic:** i want see face NOW

**_diaBOLICAL has liked this message_ **

**gin tonic:** now!!

**gin tonic:** LYDIA ANN

_**la la lu lu has left “the (better) trio” chat.** _

_**diaBOLICAL has left “the (better) trio” chat.** _

**gin tonic:** i hate everyone

_**gin tonic has left “the (better) trio” chat.** _


End file.
